Jeff Lee is Me!

NYC-based writer/ director/ painter/ theme park enthusiast/ world-class nap taker.

"Toddlers and Tiaras" Drinking Game

"Toddlers and Tiaras" Drinking Game


Watching Toddlers and Tiaras on TLC (Weds at 10pm!) is a frightening look into the dark heart of America’s soulless pageant system… and one of my favorite shows to get drunk to! Here are the rules!

TAKE A DRINK

When you see

—Strangely Spelled Names (ie Brittannie, Makynli, E’Lexxus)

—An Overweight Mom (Remember, this is a drinking game, not a not-drinking game)

—A Gay Dad (Drink more if the mom is unaware/in denial)

—A Creepy Dad (Drink more if he makes suggestive comments about his daughter’s body)

--Spray tanning!

—A Creepy Judge

—Temper tantrum

When you hear…

—“total package”

—“facial”, “facially”

—that a girl “pulled out”

—adverb errors (“she did good”  her Lolita monologue went bad”)

FINISH YOUR DRINK/TAKE A SHOT

—If someone WINS A PUPPY!

Please drink responsibly! And remember: it’s not exploitation, it’s empowerment!

(yeah…)

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